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hypno kink meta, abuse mention, long grumpy post about consent and stuff 

The idea that "hypnosis can't make anyone do things they don't want to do" is based on the obviously untrue ideas that:
- Wants are fixed, and never subject to outside influence
- People don't do things they don't want to for reasons external to themselves

"I don't want to do x" very rarely means "I will never do x under any circumstances." People can be exposed to situations where x seems like a good or fun idea, especially if they're already in a state where they're doing a bunch of good and fun things they definitely enjoy

Or with someone they've placed a certain degree of trust in already, like, I don't fucking know, a hypnotist

The basic fucking principle of hypnokink for subjects is doing what someone else tells them to do, obviously that's going to have an impact on their decision-making

If someone agrees to something during a session and later regrets it, it's not fine because they agreed to it. It means they didn't have the ability to make a clear decision in that session, something that comes up a lot in a kink that's specifically about altered mental states

For people engaging in good faith, it's not mandatory to negotiate everything in advance, or make sure subjects have a totally clear head before they make any decisions about a session, but when people don't do that they're taking on the risk of doing real harm.

It's perfectly reasonable for that risk to be acceptable, in cases where parties have a close relationship and know how to express and manage discomfort with each other. It's also often the case that people get into this kind of play, and nothing goes wrong, and that's fine too

But you cannot rely on a 'subconscious' or 'core values' or anything to prevent harm being done to someone, especially in a setting as vulnerable and intimate as a kink scene

(Which goes double for a kink where most of the point is not being able to think clearly, like, fuck)

And you especially cannot use those concepts as an excuse to blame subjects for actually wanting things that hurt them

If your response to someone telling you about a kink scene they were harmed in is "you should have said no" or "you actually wanted it", just fuck off

hypno kink meta, abuse mention, long grumpy post about consent and stuff, bdsm, actual noncon experience 

@HabitEXE While not in a hypnosis context, I've had my consent straight-up violated twice and been peer pressured into an awful sexual situation where I was subbing for someone of the wrong gender for me once, and in all three cases someone saw fit to blame me for... whatever excuse abusers come up with, whether it was "should have checked him out first" or "should have said no" or "should have been more clear" (in a case where I was in so much physical pain I couldn't get words out at all, and afterward was catatonic while he took me down and had his way with me sexually), they'll always try to find an angle from which to attack their (or someone else's) victim.

re: hypno kink meta, abuse mention, long grumpy post about consent and stuff, bdsm, actual noncon experience 

@drowsydawg I'm really sorry you were treated like that. It's fucked up, you deserve better from your community

re: hypno kink meta, abuse mention, long grumpy post about consent and stuff, bdsm, actual noncon experience 

@HabitEXE Everyone does, except the jerks who hurt people.

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A Mastodon instance for the hypnosis community; 18+, queer, and getting very sleepy.